- 02:26 You can't have your cake and eat it too, someone always gets hurt. I'm used to being hurt, not doing the hurting :( I wish this was easier. #
Officially back to LJ for good. Through my hiatus I've lost touch with alot of you and I'm sure many of you could care less about this journal. So it's that time.
Starting pretty much from scratch.
Comment to stay by Sunday otherwise time to delete.
People change. That's a truth of life. As I sit here and write this, I am contemplating the person I have become aswell as who I used to be. I feel as if I've deviated off my path of destiny in order to be what I think makes other people happy. The truth is, I got lost in this alter-ego forest and am just now seeing my path again in the distance. I look down into a puddle on my way to my path, and once again I begin to recognize my reflection. What an amazing feeling it is. And even though I may never be satisfied with everything I see staring back at me, at least it's real. I see my soul again out of the grasp of the captive demons of society and ready to enjoy the feedom of bursting to the surface.
So for a bried introduction: Hello, I'm Sasha. I'm 21 years young. I still have alot of learning and growing up to do. My life is full of countless blessings. I love my family and they are amazing. My friends are the best I could ask for. I don't know what I would do without my dogs. Animals have always given me something I never found with people; uncondtional love. I love music, painting, dancing, and may other artsy things. I am a nursing student and have no idea what my next chapter will be after graduation.
The darkness of my nightmare is finally fading into light.
Fate was cruel to me by giving me one of these guys, Partick, for only half a summer. He became one of my best friends in the short time I knew him. On Saturday, July 11, 2009 my dear friend flipped his Land Rover 7 times while speeding to work. He passed away at 1:32pm.
I was the last one to see him and talk to him before the accident. He didn't let me drive home the night before because I kept having a bad feeling about driving and getting panic attacks. He was so worried about me... Kept asking me what was wrong and to come talk to him. I just told him to pretend everything was ok, and my panic attack would go away. He just gave me a big huge hug and said ""I love you" and I replied "I love you too." That night we cuddled and watched TV, he kissed me and said I was one of the coolest girls he'd ever met and how he was so happy to have met me.
I woke him up in the morning for work when his mom called him about being late. I remember chaning out of him PJ pants back into my skirt and saying how comfortable they were. He said please don't take them, I like them too. I giggled as I folded and left them on the corner of his bed. We both brushed our teeth and walked out the door. He yelled to his roommate "I;m out man, I'll see you Monday!" We walked down the stairs to our cars. He said he'd give me a call when he was back. That was the last time I heard his voice. That's the last I ever saw of him.
I called his roommate around 1 to see if he needed a ride to the pool. Nick said he was at the hospital and he'd call me back. When he returned my call, he told me Patrick had flipped his car 7 times on the way to work that morning and he didn't look good. 2 hours later I got a phone from one of my best friends LT that he was gone.
Patrick, one of the sweetest most amazing kind hearted guys I've ever met was gone. It still hasn't hit me 100% yet. I'll go from being stone faced to balling my eyes out to laughing about our memories. It's amazing how fast life can change. Please everyone, remember to tell those that you love that you do and never take a single moment forgranted.
Me and Patrick the night I met him, we bonded instantly.
Steven Patrick Armstrong
January 14, 1989-July 11, 2009
I love you and miss you. Never to be replaced or forgoten..
So why dirrtypink?
♥I will not censor myself
-this means language, thoughts, ideas, and experiences will not be held back
♥This is my favorite color
-to me it symbolizes hope and happiness
Goodbye old, welcome new.